


Momma Knows Best

by ExecutiveShrimp



Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: Angst, Christmas, Domestic, Family, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Holidays, M/M, Oblivious Duo, Out of Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-27
Updated: 2016-12-27
Packaged: 2018-09-12 17:31:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9082438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ExecutiveShrimp/pseuds/ExecutiveShrimp
Summary: AU, oneshot, 2XOC, 2x1: This Christmas, Duo's mother has to break the news to him: he's in love with his best friend.





	

 

**WARNING: Some language, NO sex, general OOC warning**

**Beta: Shima Yi (Thank you! Merry Christmas!)**

**Momma Know Best**

 

“Stop your fidgeting,” Duo chastised lightly. With a chuckle, he reached for his partner’s hands and tugged them away from the hem of his button-up that he had been nervously playing with.

 

“I just don’t do this often – meeting the parents.”

 

Duo stared into his cobalt blue eyes, recognizing the panic; he’d warned him before – he wasn’t good with parents! “You’ll be fine, if only because my parents are just that awesome.”

 

“I’m sure they are. Much like you,” he replied sweetly.

 

They shared a smile and then the door in front of them opened. The door was opened wide and the Christmas reef swung left and right on its pin, shaking its delicate ornaments. Revealed in the doorway was Duo’s father, his arms already spread out in expectation of a hug.

 

“My prodigal son has returned!” He exclaimed, and though it was a done-to-death joke, his enthusiastic and warm-hearted delivery still made Duo laugh.

 

The tall man stepped forward over the threshold to embrace his father, making a passing remark about his Christmas sweater before hugging his Dad, feeling the prickle of the knit under his chin. “It’s good to see you, Dad,” he mumbled into the crook of his neck. He breathed in his father scent: cedar and his mom’s cooking.

 

“You too, my boy. You too. You look great.” He gave him one last, extra tight squeeze and then they both released. Duo’s father smiled up at him, his age showing in the wrinkles and laugh lines, then he looked past him at the other man still standing on his doorstep.

 

With introductions in order, Duo gestured to his boyfriend, inviting him into the house. “Dad, this is Scott. Scotty, this is my father, Harper.”

 

Scott blushed at the use of the nickname. He extended his hand, but was pulled into a hug by the senior, causing his eyes to go wide. “It’s, uh- nice to meet you, sir.”

 

“No need for formalities!” Harper assured him and took a step back, appraising the new boyfriend from top to bottom, making both Duo and Scott uncomfortable. “You can call me Harper, _Scotty_.”

 

Duo chuckled watching his boyfriend go red-faced.

 

“Come in, come in,” Harper ushered. “Let’s close this door before we melt all the snow.”

 

The two men shook off their coats and then followed Harper through the house to the kitchen in the back.

 

Duo’s mother’s eyes lit up as she noticed her son walking into her kitchen. “The prodigal son!” She rushed to him, the kitten heels of her shoes clicking on the tiled floor. Being two feet smaller than her grown child, she wrapped her arms around his waist and buried her nose into his chest.

 

Duo folded himself over to return the hug. “I missed you, mom.”

 

“I missed you too. Ohh, my baby!” She let go of him and cupped his face in her hands. “Still my handsome boy,” she concluded and playfully slapped his cheek.

 

“Okay, mom. Okay.” He straightened up. “There’s someone I want you to meet.”

 

“Isn’t there always?” She deadpanned with a little smirk.

 

“Mom!” He laughed at her and then stepped aside to introduce his boyfriend. “Scott, meet my mom, Terry.”

 

Scott reached out again for a formal handshake and was visibly relieved when Terry politely shook his hand and welcomed him into her home.

 

“It’s very nice to meet you, dear.” She turned her attention back to her son. “How was your flight? How was the landing? Was it bumpy? Do you still get scared?” She cast a sideway glance at Scott and asked him: “Does he still get scared?”

 

Duo shook his head at the barrage of questions but he was endeared by his mother’s concern. “The flight was fine. It doesn’t bother me like it used to.” Because he had found ways to deal with his anxiety.

 

“He used to be terrified of flying,” Terry said to no one in particular.

 

“You were?” Scott questioned with appropriate disbelief.

 

“You didn’t know that?” The short woman shot back.

 

“Mom, it was fine,” Duo insisted. “I’m fine. I’ve flown often enough by now.”

 

“And I’ve seen enough mice in my lifetime, but I still screech like a banshee when one skitters across my kitchen floor!”

 

Harper nodded. “I can vouch for that.”

 

Scott laughed at the exchange, causing Duo to smile as well. His parents really were great and it always warmed his heart whenever his partner realized it too.

 

Terry continued: “Did Heero fly in with you?”

 

Duo tore his gaze away from Scott’s pretty eyes and blinked at his mom. “Huh? Oh, yeah!” A smile tugged at his lips every time he thought about his best friend. “He said he’d stop by later; he got you guys a present.”

 

“He’s such a sweetheart,” Terry cooed, looking at Scott again. “He always brings Harper and I a Christmas gift. Unlike our own _son_.” She poked a red nail at Duo’s broad chest.

 

“ _Excuse me_ ,” the tall man defended himself, “I paid off your mortgage.”

 

“That was three years ago! Are we seriously going to hear about this every Christmas?”

 

“Every Christmas that you whine about me not getting you a present, yeah. You know I’m busy!” Duo shot back, rolling his eyes at her.

 

“Heero isn’t too busy to get us gifts.” She put her hands on her hips and quirked her eyebrow at him like she had just won the argument – and, in truth, she had.

 

“Well, we can all agree that Heero is a better person than me.”

 

“Hear hear,” his father interjected; he then put a hand on Scott’s shoulder, startling the younger man again. “Would you like something to drink?”

 

“Yes, thank you, sir.” The older man wagged his finger at him.  “Harper,” the blue-eyed man amended.

 

Harper offered him a toothy smile. “Duo, why don’t you give him a tour of your childhood home and tell him the censored cut of your upbringing. Then you boys make yourself comfortable in the den. I’ll go fix us all a nice drink – by the smell of it, Terry’s gingerbread cookies are nearly done.”

 

Duo took his boyfriend by his hand. He nodded over his shoulder at the archway leading back into the hallway. “I’ll show you around.” He urged him out of the kitchen and up the creaky staircase, past a succession of photos of him growing up.

 

Scott resisted his pull halfway up the stairs and pointed at the framed prom photo. “Oh… my God…” He couldn’t hold back his laughter. “Did you graduate in the seventies? What’s with that suit? Where did you even find a suit that was too big for _you_ , you giant? And the _moustache_!”

 

“Hush, don’t judge!” Duo joined him in laughter. “I was still deep in the closet back then, so deep I hadn’t even figured myself out. I thought the moustache made me look manly and it stopped people from asking questions that I couldn’t answer yet.”

 

“If you were still in the closet, why was Heero your prom date?”

 

Duo scoffed. “He wasn’t.”

 

“Then why do you have a picture with him and not a picture with your date?”

 

“Because I didn’t give a shit about my date. I don’t even remember her name.” He pulled on the hand in his grip again. “Come on, let’s go. I want to show you my room.”

 

Scott scrunched up his face and glanced back over his shoulder. They could hear the indiscriminate noise of Duo’s parents talking and moving things around in the kitchen. “Won’t it be weird? What will they think we’re doing up there?”

 

Duo shook his head at him. “They won’t think anything. They’re cool. They’re used to it.” He winced as he realized he probably shouldn’t have phrased it like that; it wasn’t very becoming to mention just how many past boyfriends he had. He pulled again and finally his boyfriend followed him upstairs. He opened the second door to the right, smiling as he peeked into his old room, and then stepped aside, allowing Scott to enter first.

 

Scott walked in and examined the walls decorated with posters of athletes, the old furniture, the Star Wars sheets, three different guitars propped up against the wall and the shelf cluttered with – and nearly buckling under the weight of - trophies. “So… You were really into sports, huh?”

 

Duo smirked and followed Scott’s gaze across the walls, but lingered on his favorite poster of an African American football player with exposed arms, flexing and glowing with sweat. “Not in the least. I thought I was, for a while. I thought that’s why I liked looking at all those strong men, for the sport, but…” He let his sentence trail off and winked.

 

“Right, but then what about the trophies?” He stepped closer to inspect them.

 

“Oh, those are from talent competitions. Singing and guitar. I pestered my Mom and Dad into driving me to basically every competition in the state.”

 

“And you won all of them, it looks like?”

 

He shrugged. “Pretty much.”

 

“Ugh, what a drag, being insanely talented,” Scott mocked.

 

Duo snickered. “I’m alright; can’t compare to Heero though.”

 

“Why? Does he have even more trophies? Does he have _two_ shelves?”

 

The taller man shook his head. “No, he only has a handful. I tried to get him to come with me to more competitions, even though I knew damn well I’d lose if he was there. But he was always too shy to compete. The only trophies he has are from local talent shows, when I convinced him to sing with me – around the time I got the first band together.”

 

Scott stared at him incredulously. “Heero Yuy was too shy? _The_ Heero Yuy?”

 

Duo chuckled. “Yeah, I know it’s hard to believe, but he used to sing background vocals for _me_ , not the other way around.”

 

“Woah.”

 

“Yeah, he really blossomed over the years. I had a really hard time getting him to agree to join when I got the current band together. I was one year out of high school, already living in LA, trying to make stuff happen with my music, but I didn’t want to be a one-man show. I like being part of a group – I don’t really need to have the spotlight on me. I found the other guys and Barb in LA; we did some gigs, but it wasn’t the same without Heero.”

 

“Without your bestie,” Scott teased.

 

“Yeah. God, I missed him like crazy that year!” Duo’s face scrunched up, still remembering how horrible it was to be away from him – like he had been separated from his twin. “It’s the only time we’ve ever been apart since we first met.”

 

“When did you first meet?”

 

Duo frowned at the question. Didn’t he tell him that already? He had told the story so many times to friends, boyfriends, interviewers, that he was losing track. “When we were seven- Well, no, when _I_ was seven, he was six.”

 

“God, so you weren’t exaggerating when you said you guys grew up together.”

 

“Do I ever exaggerate?” They both kept a straight face for as long as they could, but they burst out in laughter at the same time. “No, no, for once I wasn’t exaggerating. Our parents got together, the adoption agency introduced them- I told you Heero was adopted too, right?”

 

Scott smiled and shook his head, “No, but I’ve seen the pic of Heero with his parents at your place and I figured it out, since he doesn’t exactly look like them.”

 

That was an understatement. Heero – being half-Japanese – was short and slim, with a golden hue and delicate, exotic features and a wild mop of black hair that he regularly bleached to experiment with different colors; from a bright purple last year to a modest brown at the moment. His eyes were an incredible shade of cobalt blue, much like Scott’s eyes, although probably even prettier, since they had that unique sparkle in them that Duo had never seen in anybody else’s eyes.

 

Heero’s parents, on the other hand, were pure descendants of the Nordic bloodline if he ever saw one. Both his mother and father were tall as trees, with curly blonde hair and strong – “robust” – features and their skin pinkish. “Yuy” was just a stage-name he had chosen for himself, since Heero Troutman – his real name – just didn’t have the same ring to it.

 

“Anyway, so our parents started meeting up, to share their experiences and stuff and that’s how we met and we became best friends. Luck had it that we ended up going to the same schools, with this being a small town and all. So, we pretty much spent every day – all day – together.”

 

“And you never got sick of each other, huh?” Scott asked although he must have already known the answer, considering that when Duo convinced Heero to join him LA after high school graduation, they became roommates. They have been living together ever since, even though now that they were two-fifths of a successful band, they made more than enough money to get a nice place on their own. They upgraded their initial apartment for an increasingly bigger house and never felt the need for their own space; even in the big house they shared now, they chose the two adjoining bedrooms out of the six, and while their enormous couch could seat twelve, they always cuddled up together on one end.

 

“Never.”

 

“Your parents really like him too.”

 

Duo chuckled at the second euphemism in the past few minutes. “They love him. They often joke that they regret not adopting Heero instead of me. Especially whenever I was being a handful, like dragging them to all those competitions.”

 

“Yeah, they adopted one dead-beat of a son,” Scott deadpanned with a roll of his eyes. “Didn’t I spot your _Grammy_ on their mantel on our way in?”

 

“Heero has the exact same Grammy,” Duo pointed out. The entire band did – they won it together, last year, after three consecutive years of nominations in different categories.

 

“Yeah, but that one has _your_ name on it.”

 

He smirked proudly. “It does.” His Twitter profile was still a picture of him kissing the golden gramophone.

 

“Boys!” Duo’s father bellowed at the bottom of the staircase. “I don’t want to interrupt anything – and I don’t want to _know_ anything – but drinks and cookies are waiting!”

 

Scott blushed furiously and buried his face in his hands. “Oh God, they don’t think-”

 

“Stop worrying about that stuff.” Duo peeled Scott’s hands away from his face and placed a chaste kiss on his boyfriend’s lips. “Let’s go.”

 

Hand-in-hand they headed downstairs and walked into the den, where Scott self-consciously tugged his hand free from Duo’s grip. They took a seat in the two remaining empty lounge chairs of the four that were arranged in a semi-circle around the fireplace. Duo complimented his mother on a beautifully decorated Christmas tree and Scott chimed in a little too enthusiastically.

 

Duo suffered through the regular embarrassment as his father alerted Scott that he was in the presence of a Grammy that stood gleaming on their mantel, and recounted the tale of when they got the news the band had won. Duo was proud of what he had achieved with Heero and the rest of the band, patting himself on the back for being the founding member; but when he was back at home, he didn’t like talking about his career and his music, not even about the awards he had garnered. He had given his parents the Grammy for safe-keeping because he knew how much it meant to them; it was one of his ways of thanking them for always supporting him, and never questioning him when he decided to move to LA to make music, rather than apply to colleges.

 

Back in his childhood home, he just wanted to feel like his old self; sometimes he missed his old life even though he knew he had been blessed by how things had worked out. Maybe that was why, after all those years, he still enjoyed Heero’s presence over anybody else’s; no matter where they were in the world – on tour, at a fancy award ceremony, in the studio or at a talk show – Heero always felt like _home_.

 

Terry placed a tray of freshly baked gingerbread cookies on the coffee table and arranged the tubes of colorful frosting and edible beads.

 

“This is our family tradition,” Duo explained to Scott. “We all decorate our own cookies.”

 

“That’s cute!”

 

Terry giggled, and when her son looked at her with a frown, she waved her hand dismissively and encouraged everyone to start decorating.

 

Harper simply slathered a single color of frosting onto his first gingerbread man, then sat back and washed down his first bite with a sip from his hot peppermint chocolate milk, named after the Peppermint Schnaps that were part of the recipe.

 

Duo wasn’t very artistic but he gave it his best effort, making the gingerbread man a girl by fashioning it with a skirt and long, yellow locks of hair. He put the cookie down on his plate and confiscated the next for decorating.

 

“So,” Duo’s mother started, never looking up from her own creation, “what do you do for a living, Shawn?”

 

Duo snapped his head up to glare at her. “Mom!” Terry looked up innocently. “His name is _Scott_.”

 

“Oh, that’s right,” she said, not sounding the least bit apologetic. “Shawn was last year.”

 

Duo fumed at her odd, aloof behavior, not understanding why it seemed like she was being rude on purpose.

 

Before Duo could call her out on in, Harper interjected: “No no, dear, Shawn was Thanksgiving 2014.”

 

She looked at her husband with a frown. “Then who was last year? Evan?”

 

“Evan was _Christmas_ 2014,” Harper supplied, most unhelpfully.

 

Duo’s eyes bugged out – he didn’t even dare to look at Scott to his left. “Mom! Dad!” He yelled, praying for them to stop.

 

His parents exclaimed in unison, as they both remembered last year’s boyfriend at the same time: “Da~vid!”

 

“Oh my God, are you guys kidding me with this shit?!”

 

Terry raised her finger at him. “There is no need for that kind of language, Duo. We still do not allow cussing in this house, you know that.”

 

Harper chuckled and shook his head, like he knew a dirty little secret. His mom could probably curse like the Devil when she thought nobody was around to overhear her.

 

Duo turned his body to face Scott. “I’m so sorry about this.”

 

“It’s fine,” he shrugged; he seemed more amused than anything. “I know you’ve had a lot of boyfriends, Duo.”

 

“Duo is a ‘serial monogamist’,” Harper said.

 

“Oh, God.” Duo dropped his face down into his palms.

 

“That’s nothing to be embarrassed about,” Harper insisted, while haphazardly decorating his second cookie so he could eat it. “When you’re in a relationship, you give it your all. Right off the bat, you’re all in. And you don’t let the break-ups get to you. You just jump right back in it.”

 

Duo groaned into his hands. Did his father really not realize how bad that made him sound?

 

The doorbell rang and Duo couldn’t have been more relieved. He raised his head and checked his watch. “That’s probably Heero.”

 

His mother jumped up from her seat and Harper settled back in his chair, grateful that he didn’t have to get up for once. Terry practically bounced out of the room as she hurried to the hallway.

 

Duo listened as she answered the door. She squealed – yes, the fifty-nine year old woman squealed – as she opened the door. “Heero! Sweetheart! It is so great to see you! Come here!” Duo imagined her pulling his childhood friend into her arms for her trademark, tight hug. He smiled as he heard Heero’s breathless chuckle and the quiet ‘oomph’ as he was pulled close by the older woman. “How are you, sweetheart? How was the flight?”

 

“It was fine.”

 

“Was Duo scared?”

 

Duo rolled his eyes.

 

Heero answered: “Not at all.” That was a lie, Duo still felt groggy from the half-tablet of Benadryl that he had to take; he gripped Heero’s hand during the take-off and landing like he always did, rather than Scott’s, even though his boyfriend was seated right next to him as well. That was just out of habit, and his friend knew exactly how to deal with him.

 

“Honey, you look skinny. Why do you look skinny? Are you eating well?”

 

“I’m eating fine. I look exactly the same as last time,” Heero assured her. 

 

“Can I take your coat?” Terry asked.

 

“Oh, I’m not staying long. I just wanted to say hi and give you this.”

 

“Wow, what a big box!” Terry raised her voice to make sure Duo would hear. “What a generous gift! I can’t wait to find out what you got us. Thank you so much. You are such an angel.” She planted an audible smooch on him.

 

Duo chuckled at his mother’s antics.

 

There was the sound of footsteps and then Heero appeared in the archway leading into the den. He looked great in his long grey coat and flecks of snow top of his head.

 

“Look who it is!” Terry called out in excitement. She pinched Heero’s cheek and threw a look over her shoulder at her husband. “Doesn’t he look skinny?”

 

Harper shook his head at her and raised himself out of his seat to properly greet Heero. “It’s good to see you again, son,” the big, lumbering man said quietly as he wrapped his arms around the other man’s smaller frame. “It’s been too long, you should’ve just come celebrate Thanksgiving with us this year, while your parents were away,” he commented, patting his big hand on Heero’s back before letting go.

 

Duo remembered telling him the exact same thing. He felt horrible leaving Heero behind in LA as he flew home for Thanksgiving. He would have loved for them to have spent that holiday together, with Duo’s family. Usually the holidays were the only time of year that they weren’t together and that was the one thing he hated about them.

 

“I like your hair,” Harper remarked, as he had been less impressed with the crazy colors of last year. He brushed the snow out of his wild locks.

 

Heero laughed. “Thanks.” He turned his attention to Duo and Scott. “Are they giving you guys a hard time?”

 

“You have no idea,” Duo muttered.

 

“Come decorate cookies with us,” Terry invited him. “It’s tradition!”

 

“Uhmm…” Heero looked at the tray – there were still plenty of cookies left – and paused in thought for a moment. “Yeah, okay!” He told Terry and Harper to sit down as they were both about to fetch him a chair from the other room. Heero took off his coat and draped it over the back of Duo’s chair and then simply took a seat on the armrest. Duo enjoyed the closeness, knowing he would have to miss his friend for the rest of the Christmas weekend.

 

“How are your parents? Did they have a fun time in Hawaii over Thanksgiving?” Duo asked as he watched Heero reach for a cookie from the tray and the tube of red frosting.

 

“For sure! Yeah, they took like a thousand pictures. Dad is preparing the slideshow on his laptop right now, so you can imagine my _excitement_.” They exchanged a look and laughed.

 

“I thought the pictures were lovely,” Terry said. Harper and her had always remained close friends with Heero’s parents, even going on vacations together from time to time.

 

“I’m sure I’ll enjoy seeing them very much.” Heero had trouble keeping a straight face. He waited for Scott to finish with the white frosting and then used it to finish the Santa suit he had given his gingerbread man.

 

“Looks good,” Duo complimented, leaning in closer to watch him work.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Hmhm.” When Duo moved to take another cookie from the tray, he caught his mother looking at him with a mysterious smile. He quirked an eyebrow at her and was confused all the more when she shook her head and then simply took a sip of her hot chocolate. 

 

“Did you bring someone special to meet your parents this year?” Harper asked.

 

Heero shook his head and bit the foot off his gingerbread man. Grinning and with a mouth full, he said: “You know me, always single.” His tone was flat.

 

Heero had never brought anyone home to meet his parents. Heero dated plenty, but it never evolved into a serious relationship. It didn’t help that he dated utter assholes; none of them were ever good enough for Heero. Duo worried about him sometimes, but Heero told him not to – he was just having fun and didn’t feel like he was missing out on anything as long he had Duo to come home to. Duo was always happy to keep him company and make him laugh after a bad date.

 

Duo grabbed his “gingerbread girl” off the plate and was about to take his first bite when Heero stopped him.

 

“That’s not finished, you can’t eat it yet,” he berated him. He pointed at the cookie and stated with a giggle: “She’s topless!”

 

Duo looked at the underdressed cookie and let out a hearty laugh. He held it up to Heero, noting he was still holding the tube of white frosting. “Give her a cute top then.”

 

With a smile Heero put two dollops of frosting on her “chest”, connecting them with a thin line.

 

“Oooh, strapless. _Risqué_.”

 

Heero leaned in close and whispered in Duo’s ear, soft enough so the parents wouldn’t overhear: “She’s a slut.”

 

Duo nearly choked on his laughter and took a quick bite to silence himself. He looked over at Scott, who eyed him quizzically; he felt sorry about leaving him out of the fun. He hadn’t even looked his way since Heero walked through the door, but he probably wouldn’t have gotten the joke anyway. Like so many things, it was something between Heero and him. To make up for neglecting his boyfriend, Duo looked at the decorated cookies on his plate and complimented them, causing Scott to smile.

 

Heero made another cookie, exactly like Duo’s gingerbread girl, and shortly after fitting her with her white top, he licked off the frosting and purposefully swirled his tongue.

 

“Oh my God!” Duo pressed his face into his friend’s side to muffle his laughter.

 

The Japanese man giggled and then innocently took a bite as he became aware of the parents staring at the two of them.

 

“ _You’re_ a slut,” Duo teased quietly, poking him between the ribs.

 

“I can’t control myself; I just like girls _so~o_ much.”

 

Duo felt tears welling up in his eyes as his body shook with laughter. One of the running gags between them was that Heero was basically the gayest person Duo had ever met – the idea of him being with a girl was innately amusing. As a tenor, his voice was naturally very high when he sang, and light and feminine as he spoke while making delicate gestures with his hands. He refused to go on stage without make-up on: dark, smoky eyes. Fangirls would go crazy over the Japanese band member, even though he was open about his sexuality; Heero would jokingly sign the posters and CDs they handed him with “I’d totally go straight for you” and it was always funny because it painted such an odd picture. The only way for Heero to be a with a girl would be for the woman to be “the man” in the relationship. There was that one time at a party, at an hour by which everyone was _very_ drunk, when Heero made out with Kate – their publicist’s assistant and friend – on a dare. Afterward the tenor had burst out in song: “I kissed a girl and I liked it!”

 

To exact revenge on his friend for making him weep with laughter, Duo tickled him, knowing exactly how sensitive he was to that. He only laughed harder when Heero thrashed and fell into his lap. He stopped his assault and let him climb back onto the armrest, his golden face tinted red. Duo shot Scott another sheepish look. He couldn’t help himself – whenever he was around Heero it was easy for them to drift off into their own little world where only the two of them existed. Scott was probably used to it by now, after six weeks of dating Duo and knowing him as a friend for over a year, but that still wasn’t fair.

 

His friendship with Heero oftentimes got in the way of the relationship, and their closeness was the reason for more break-ups than Duo cared to admit. No matter how in love he was with someone, Heero would always come first; he would never choose anyone over Heero, so whenever a boyfriend gave him that ultimatum, the relationship was over. He never mourned past boyfriends much. He never missed any of them once they were gone, which was always confirmation that breaking up had been the right choice. Duo was the kind of guy to fall in love easily, even as he recognized the guy wasn’t a good fit for him, and as the relationship ran its course and came to an end, he bounced back quickly, with Heero’s help. His comfort and his assurance that he’ll find the right guy someday.

 

Maybe Scott was that guy. Duo didn’t know yet. He liked Scott; he was very attractive and very funny and, so far, had been nothing but understanding with regard to Duo’s demanding career and his odd, intimate friendship with Heero. He didn’t share Duo’s crass, dry humor quite like Heero did, but he had fun with Scott, and the sex was amazing and _often_. 

 

“Scott, you never got around to telling us what it is you do for a living.” Terry interrupted her son’s train of thought.

 

“Oh, mm,” Scott looked flustered; having just taken a big bite, he was stuck with a mouth full of crumbling cookie. He went red as everyone watched and waited for him to finish. “I- Uh- Sorry about that. I’m a stop-motion artist.”

 

Duo watched his parents’ perplexed reaction as the job description meant little to them. “He made the music video for _New Year’s Day_ for us. You know? The one with the snowmen? That’s how we met.”

 

His explanation sparked a memory and his mother exclaimed: “Oh! I remember now. That one was very cute.”

 

“That’s how you met?” Harper asked. “Didn’t you release that last year?”

 

The three younger men nodded in unison. “Scott and I were friends first for a while,” Duo clarified.

 

“Hn.” Duo looked at his mother who had made the judgmental little sound but she hid behind her mug of hot chocolate again.

 

His father continued, interested: “Are there a lot of job opportunities in ‘stop-motion’?”

 

“Enough,” answered Scott. “I also work a lot on commercials and opening themes for YouTube shows.”

 

“YouTube has shows now?”

 

Scott and Harper talked – Scott tried to explain the strange workings of the internet to the older man – while Duo kept staring at his mother, watching her purse her lips – it was obvious she was hiding something and was having a lot of difficulty containing the secret. It seemed like she didn’t like Scott very much, but he didn’t understand why. Scott was well-mannered and kind and had done nothing wrong.

 

He was pulled from his thoughts by Heero putting a hand on his shoulder and leaning in to speak quietly into his ear.

 

“I’m gonna head back to the folks,” he announced. He then slipped off the armrest and put on his coat.

 

Duo pouted. “So soon?”

 

Heero smiled and buttoned up his coat. “Yes. I have a slideshow to get to.”

 

Terry noticed Heero was getting ready to leave and mirrored her son’s disappointment exactly as she whined: “So soon?”

 

“I’ll stop by a little longer on Monday, before we leave,” Heero promised in order to appease her, although he did genuinely enjoy spending time with Duo’s parents. Heero bent forward and kissed Duo’s cheek in goodbye, like he always did when they parted ways, however brief. “Merry Christmas, Duo.” He straightened up and hugged Terry and Harper goodbye, wishing them a Merry Christmas as well, and reminding them to open the present he had gotten them. When the older couple pestered him into spoiling what the gift was, he revealed that it was a chocolate fountain; Harper and Terry both got excited thinking about what treats they could dip into the molten chocolate.

 

“See you later, Scott – _good luck_.” Heero waved him goodbye and Duo’s mother accompanied him to the front door.

 

The two of them stood on the front step talking for a minute, but their voices were hushed so Duo couldn’t hear what they were saying.

 

“I love you, sweetheart. I’ll see you Monday.” Terry closed the front door and returned to the den with a sour look on her face. She sat down and took another sip of her hot chocolate, but couldn’t force on another smile.

 

Harper had more questions about “The YouTube” for Scott and the young man was kind enough to amuse him, explaining as much as he could. Out of the blue, Terry shot up from her seat again and announced that she was getting started on dinner; she then stomped out of the room and disappeared into her kitchen.

 

Confused as well as agitated by her unusual behavior, Duo waited a heartbeat before following her, first sharing a look with Scott to make sure he was okay with being left alone with his Dad. He walked into the kitchen, flinching at the angry sound of pots and pans as she arranged everything on the stove, and then moved to the cutting board to dice vegetables.

 

“Mom? What’s going on?”

 

She had her back towards him. Her shoulders deflated as she let out a dramatic sigh. “Oh Duo, you silly, silly boy.” Her voice was strained.

 

“What? I don’t understand. Is something wrong?” He closed the distance between them and touched her shoulder, wanting her to look at him, but she shook away his hand and stubbornly kept facing away from him. “Mom?” He froze when he heard her sniffle and unfortunately she had not yet started on cutting the onions.

 

“Just leave me alone for a minute, okay honey? Mommy is a little emotional right now.”

 

“Mom…”

 

“Please. We’ll talk later. Okay?”

 

“Okay…” Duo agreed uncertainly. He just stood there for a minute, not knowing what to do. He offered to help with dinner but she said “I got it”. Defeated and all the more confused, he retreated back into the den where Harper was getting lessons on Snapchat, holding Scott’s phone up to his face and studying the random filters.

 

“Everything okay?” Scott asked, since Harper was distracted anyway.

 

“Oh, yeah. Fine.” He sat down and finished eating his cookie with small bites.

 

During dinner, Harper did most of the talking. After being introduced to the odd applications of modern technology in the twenty-first century, he went on a rant, romanticizing “the good old days”. Scott latched on, waxing poetically about the outdated art of ‘stop-motion’ being so much purer as a medium for storytelling than modern animation or CGI. The conversation was only ever interrupted by someone complimenting Terry’s cooking.

 

Over dessert – the pie was saved for tomorrow in favor of testing out the chocolate fountain – they talked about the festivities they had planned for the weekend. The entire family was coming over on Saturday to celebrate Christmas Eve, and Duo looked forward to seeing his cousins and their little children, even though they could get rowdy from the “SRA”, a term coined by his mother: “Santa-Related-Anxiety”. The children would spend the night, giving their parents a much-needed rest, and in the morning they would have to wait for everyone to gather again before they were allowed to unwrap their presents. Everyone always arrived in their pajamas and cute, snuggling onesies – adults becoming children again – and the day would consist of lounging in the TV room and a lot of eating; and the kids would get dressed to play in the snow in the backyard and climb into Duo’s old treehouse, where he spent many hours cooped up with Heero when he was young.

 

Duo, Scott and Heero were booked on a flight back to LA on Monday, late in the afternoon. Heero was coming over, but Duo had planned to use that day to show Scott around his hometown. Harper told him the couple was free to spend their time doing whatever they wanted – they wouldn’t mind spending some time alone with Heero to catch up, without Duo around to distract Heero and making him all giggly. His parents shared a meaningful look that Duo didn’t understand.

 

Once everyone had eaten their fill, Duo helped his mom clear the table while Scott got pulled along by the arm by Harper, who wanted to show the younger man an actual gramophone and play him some old records – being all about that “authentic sound”.

 

Duo called after them: “You know we released our latest album on LP!” He added in his best marketing voice: “It’s the perfect Christmas gift. You can find it in stores near _you_.” He surrendered Scott to his fate and shuttled a stack of plates into the kitchen, where his mother was loading the dishwasher.

 

In the privacy of the kitchen, out of earshot from the other two who were in his Dad’s study, Duo asked: “So, can we talk now?”

 

His mother shot him a look. “ _Now?_ ”

 

“It’s ‘later’,” he pointed out.

 

“Honey…”

 

“No, don’t try to brush me off. If not now, then when? Tomorrow, when everybody else is here? Sunday? Nope, can’t do that either. Monday? Nope, no good either. Wanna do it over the phone once I’m back in LA?”

 

She narrowed her eyes at him. “Tone down the attitude, mister.”

 

“Oh, I’m giving _you_ attitude? You’ve been throwing shade at Scott all day.”

 

Terry scoffed. “I don’t even know what that means.”

 

“The Shawn-thing? And those looks and little sounds?” Guilt flitted through her eyes as she knew he was right. “He’s a great guy, mom,” Duo insisted.

 

“I’m sure he’s wonderful, honey.”

 

“Then why don’t you like him?”

 

His mother sighed and wiped her hands on a dishtowel after fitting the last of the pots and pans into the dishwasher. “It’s not that I don’t like him,” she started – she was having trouble meeting his gaze. “I _do_ like him. I like him, just as I liked Shawn, just as I liked Evan, just as I liked-…”

 

“David,” he supplied irritably as she was once more stumped for his name.

 

“Da~vid, that’s right. I’ve liked all of your boyfriends, Duo. They were all very kind boys and I was very happy that I got to meet them.” She stepped towards him and cupped his face in her small hands. “I am very happy that my son brings home his boyfriends to meet his mother and father. That means a lot to me.” She rubbed his cheek and then released him.

 

“But?” He waited impatiently.

 

“But…” She paused as she considered her words, “it’s starting to become a little tiring to go through the same song and dance every year. Meeting the boyfriend. Hearing how you guys met. Asking him what he does for a living…” she trailed off. “It’s tiring because I think you and I both know how this is going to end; in another late-afternoon call to tell us you broke up. And then we’re back to square one.”

 

Duo’s jaw dropped. “What? Why would you say this? You don’t know that! I certainly don’t know that.”

 

“You really don’t, huh?” She shook her head at him. “You honestly don’t have a clue?” She questioned.  He shrugged, not knowing what she was getting at.  She sighed dramatically. “Okay, then, let me break it down for you: you’re in love-”

 

“Yeah, with Scott.”

 

She ignored him and finished: “- with Heero.”

 

Duo’s heart skipped a beat.

 

“And you’ve only ever been in love with him, no one else.”

 

Once the shock of her words wore off, Duo managed to organize his thoughts anew; he snorted at the suggestion. “Mom, come on. That’s ridiculous. You sound like one of those crazy fangirls that ‘ship us’ together. Just because we’re both gay-”

 

She raised her finger, effectively silencing him. “Don’t treat me like I’m ignorant, Duo. I know very well that it takes more than compatible sexuality.”

 

“Excuse me, but you are treating _me_ like _I’m_ ignorant: trying to tell me I’ve been in love with my best friend all this time and I’ve just been too stupid to notice,” he hissed.

 

“I don’t think it’s ignorance. I think you are too close to have a good perspective on this. And maybe that’s my fault, maybe I should have separated you from Heero once in a while, rather than letting the two of you grow into conjoined twins.”

 

“Yeah, _twins_! That’s exactly it! We’re _brothers_. I’m not in love with my brother,” Duo argued and he made a disgusted face to emphasize his point. “What you’re suggesting is incest.”

 

Terry wagged her finger at him. “Don’t do that, don’t give me some bullshit Strawman-argument.”

 

Duo’s eyes widened. “Mom! Language! No cussing in this house.” He didn’t really feel like laughing, but he did anyway, hoping to lighten the atmosphere and get her to change the subject.

 

“It’s my house, I can bend the rules however I see fit.”

 

Before she could continue, Duo started for the door, mumbling something about wanting to hear his dad play records on the gramophone.

 

“Dustin Uriel Oxford Maxwell,” she snapped.

 

Duo tensed up at the sound of his full name, knowing he was in real trouble and that there was no escape.

 

“You said you wanted to talk, so we are going to talk.”

 

He slowly pivoted on his heels, his face screwed into an uncomfortable expression. He was not looking forward to this.

 

“I’ve been waiting ten years for you to figure this out on your own, ever since you were sixteen years old and you stopped singing right on stage, forgetting the words to _Heartache Tonight_ because Heero was belting out a high note along with Agustín’s guitar riff. My patience has worn thin.”

 

He blinked at her. He remembered the moment – he remembered it as well as she did apparently. He still got shivers thinking about it. Heero had been reluctant to sing the note during rehearsals and no matter how much Duo had pleaded him, he said he refused to do it on stage during the talent competition, too scared of messing up. But then all of a sudden there it was, halfway into a rock song of a different era; a glimpse of what Heero would become. Duo had stopped singing his solo, unfazed by the crowd and the shocked gasp that passed through them like a wave. He had stopped to make a quiet promise to himself in that moment: to always be by Heero’s side and encourage him to sing and to give him the confidence that he needed. Because Duo couldn’t only hear how beautiful he sounded – how perfectly on pitch – but also how happy and liberated he was and that was even more important to him.

 

“I stopped singing because I thought he was a good singer and obviously I was right. We won a Grammy for best _vocal_ album, for Chr- for Pete’s sake.” He vainly hoped mentioning the Grammy would somehow distract her from her point.

 

“It wasn’t about his singing; it was about how free he was in that moment, so far removed from the insecure boy that he was, and you wanted him to have that forever – you wanted to _give_ him that.” Duo reeled back at how well his mother had read him. “You’ve basically devoted your entire life to making Heero happy, because that’s all you’ve ever needed to be happy yourself.”

 

“Mom…” He let out an exasperated sigh. “Don’t conflate that with love though. I mean, yes, I love him – of course I do – but not in the way you’re getting at. That’s crazy.” He felt uncomfortable even entertaining the thought of being romantically involved with Heero; it would be wrong. He had decided that a long time ago, not even remembering the specifics of how or why.

 

“Do you really think it’s crazy? Really?” She pressed. “Then help me understand, Duo. Help me understand what’s so crazy about it.”

 

He was stumped for an explanation. “It just… is. He’s my friend – I can’t think of him like that.”

 

Of course she was unconvinced, in fact, she looked victorious, as if she had him on the ropes. “Well, apparently Scott was just a friend first too, but you could change your mind about him.”

 

“That’s different!” Was it?

 

“Yes, it is.”

 

Okay, great.

 

“Because you’re not actually in love with Scott. You’re in love with Heero,” she pulled the rug out from underneath him “When Heero’s around you can hardly take your eyes off him, and you look at him with such adoration,” she pointed out, “and you two always gravitate towards each other, always needing to be close, you get fidgety otherwise.”

 

“I don’t,” he mumbled childishly, even though he knew she was right.

 

“You talk about him all the time,” she continued unrelenting, “Oh, the hoops your mind must jump through to spin a conversation towards the topic of Heero.” She chuckled lightly. “I bet you spent most of the time you were up in your old bedroom with Scott talking about Heero.”

 

His face blanched. Had she been eavesdropping or was he really that predictable?

 

“When we ask you how a concert went, the first thing you say is how great Heero was. And every time, you tell us how angry you get when the crowd cheers before Heero has even finished one of his incredible notes or riffs, because you can’t hear him when they do that and you can’t stand that, even though you’ve heard him hit the same note a million times.”

 

He shook his head. She wasn’t making any sense to him. None of what she said meant what she thought it meant!

 

“And don’t think I don’t know exactly who you are thinking about every Thanksgiving and every Christmas when you zone out of the conversation and stare into thin air.”

 

He clenched his fists at his sides and chewed on the inside of his cheek. She wasn’t being fair – she was misconstruing things and it was frustrating him.

 

“Honey,” she said in a calm tone, even as she noticed his anger, “why are you getting so upset? It’s not like it’s a bad thing. Wouldn’t it be wonderful for you and Heero to be together?”

 

“Of course not!” Duo snapped. “First of all, we don’t feel that way about each other and second of all, do you even understand how badly we can fuck up our lives if we dated and it didn’t work out?” She let the curse-word slide without reprimanding him. “We’re in a band together, Mom. He’s the lead vocalist, I’m the guitarist! If everything got screwed up and awkward, what do you think would happen to the band? We’d be ripping it apart!”

 

“Oh, baby,” she sympathized and her eyes welled up with tears. She rubbed her hands up and down his arms until he relaxed – until he stopped trembling and unclenched his fists. “That fear, that you’re feeling right now, is exactly why I think you’ve never come to this conclusion on your own. The band is your life, but more importantly, it’s Heero’s life – it’s what made him blossom – and you’d never want to do anything to ruin that. I understand. You’ve been protecting him all your life; from bullies and shitty boyfriends and assholes in the industry…”

 

“It’s not like that,” he whined pathetically, wondering why she wouldn’t just believe him and let it go.

 

“I’m going to tell you the same thing I told Heero,” his mother announced solemnly. “You don’t have to worry about ripping the band apart if you ever break up, because you wouldn’t ever break up. You’ve been more than just friends since you were six and seven years old, and nothing has come between you. You have a bond that is so special. Embrace it,” she urged.

 

Duo let the words sink in and then furrowed his brows at her. “What do you mean ‘the same thing I told Heero’?”

 

“Tsk. That’s all you took away from what I said?”

 

“Mom, did you talk to Heero about this?” He demanded. His heart started to thunder in his chest again.

 

She was about to answer when Scott walked into the kitchen. With a chipper tone he wondered: “About what?” He halted and observed the scene he had walked into. “I’m interrupting something, I’m sorry.”

 

Duo cleared his throat, to get some of the rawness out of his voice. “Scotty, would you please give us another minute?”

 

“Yeah, sure. Your dad has way more records he wants to show me anyway,” he joked and joined Harper again in the study at the other end of the house.

 

Duo felt horrible having that conversation with his mother while Scott was in the other room – it felt like a betrayal somehow, even though he was not the one saying the wrong things. “What did you talk to Heero about?”

 

She regarded him defiantly. “I had a very similar conversation with Heero as few years ago.”

 

“A few _years_ ago?” He repeated, dumbfounded and increasingly more annoyed.

 

“Yes. But, unlike you, he had little trouble admitting that he’s been in love with you since he was a teen.”

 

The reveal struck him like lightning. He stood rigid, with electricity prickling his body all over. “…” He tried to speak, but he couldn’t, his mouth had gone too dry and his parched tongue wouldn’t move.

 

“He’s in love with you,” she reiterated with a level tone.

 

It was like a switch was flipped back, breaking the current that passed through his body and his stature deflated. He hung his head and muttered into his palms. “Why would you say that? That’s gonna fuck with my head.” He felt lightheaded so he lowered one hand to seek purchase on the edge of the countertop.

 

He knew she was telling the truth, if only because he knew she would never lie to him. If she said Heero told her that, than he did. His mind was overwhelmed with nearly twenty years’ worth of memories. All the giggles, the small touches, the cuddling and the kisses on his cheek… Heero had been in love with him during all of it? Both his head and his heart hurt.

 

“He asked me not to tell you and I promised him I wouldn’t,” Terry elaborated with a guilty expression, “But that was three years ago, when I believed you were _this_ close-” she pinched her thumb and index finger together, leaving no more than a quarter inch of space between them “-to making a confession of love yourself. I’m sorry, but I can’t be a bystander anymore. I can’t stand another Christmas playing nice with your new boyfriend, knowing how much Heero is needlessly hurting to be with you and how happy he could make you. I had to speak up.”

 

“But I’m with Scott now. I like Scott,” Duo muttered dumbly. He fixed a desperate gaze on her, wishing she could take it all back and rid him of his confusion and distress.

 

“I know. But it won’t work, for the same reason none of your relationships have worked. Because he’s not Heero. You know that has been the problem. You know.”

 

His mind was spinning, leaving him speechless and defenseless again.

 

“You told me once that you never miss any of your boyfriends. Not when you’re away on tour, not when you’re too busy to hang out, not even when you break up. Have you ever wondered why that is?” She probed.

 

Duo shrugged pathetically, not able to respond in any other way.

 

“Because you have Heero. You’ve been trying to fill a void that is already full.”

 

He wished he could deny that logic, but if he was being completely honest with himself, he had to admit there was truth to that. He was easily satisfied in a relationship, even when he knew the guy wasn’t really right for him – didn’t have the same interests, the same humor, the same demeanor or the same drive – because his friendship with Heero made up for all the shortcomings in the romantic relationship. He always argued that was only fair, that he couldn’t expect anyone to have all the things in common with him that he shared with his lifelong friend. It took the pressure off the relationship, leaving him content. He thought it was a good thing, he had never considered that it could mean anything.

 

His mother was smiling at him as she watched puzzle pieces fall into place. She prompted: “Describe your perfect day for me.”

 

“Uhh…” He struggled getting his thoughts in order. He looked off to the side, it was difficult to look his mother in the eyes, now that he knew she saw things that he had been blind to. It made him self-conscious. “I- Uhh… Why?”

 

“Humor me.”

 

He released a deep breath and closed his eyes. A memory from earlier that week was summoned, when Heero woke him up early in the morning because he was cursing up a storm after stubbing his toe against the foot of his bed. Duo could hear him through the walls; he rushed into his bedroom to check on him, then mocked him and punished him for waking him with an assault of tickles. Afterward, they got dressed and went to Starbucks to get coffee together, like they did every morning. Duo pretended that he was going to park in the Handicapped-zone – they had laughed so hard they were crying. When they went into the coffee shop with bloodshot eyes, the barista had carefully asked them if they were alright, and another laughing fit had erupted.

 

“I guess… Go get coffee with Heero to start with.” Duo looked at his mother and she nodded along encouragingly. “Then have breakfast at some hole-in-the-wall diner where we won’t get recognized. Spend the day in the recording studio,” because he loved making music and he loved hearing Heero sing without the clamoring of fans. “Have dinner with the band and the sound-mix guys… Go to the pier with Heero and get another tattoo,” he had many of them and always loved adding to them, especially with Heero, who was addicted to the body art, much like him. “I mean, if we’re talking the absolute _perfect_ day we’d have a concert in the evening, even though there aren’t enough hours in the day. Get the high of performing and then after just hang on the couch with Heero as we _crash_ , drink some wine to make us light on our way down…” Thoughtlessly he concluded: “And fall asleep in the same bed like we used to do on tour, back in the day, when we’d share a hotel room.”

 

“How would Scott fit into that day?”

 

“I don’t know!” He exclaimed and he threw his hands up, feeling awful about himself. “Have sex with Scott during lunch hour?” His eyes widened in shock at his own words. He couldn’t believe he had said that and in front of his _mother_. 

 

His mother didn’t share in his horror. She simply nodded and coolly supplied: “What about making love with Heero during lunch hour?”

 

“Mom!” The mental images that the blunt question prompted were completely inappropriate for a son to have in his mother’s kitchen. He also didn’t like how easily those images came to him and how detailed they were.

 

“I know I didn’t raise you to be a prude,” she said, “and we can talk about this sort of thing.”

 

He stammered something incoherent. He was distracted by a sensation on his cheek: the memory of Heero’s tender kiss, the feel of those soft lips pressed against him. Other parts of his body followed suit: his shoulder warmed where Heero would rest his head, falling asleep against him on the couch; his thigh tingled where Heero would place his hand to get his attention when he was lost in thought, thinking up the chord progression for their next song or any other random thing; his waist quivered at the memory of Heero’s arms wrapped tight around him as he hugged him from behind when the smaller man was upset, and needed Duo’s comfort but didn’t want him to look at his tear-streaked face.

 

The sparks that his simple touches caused made it dizzying trying to imagine what it would be like to be intimate with him.

 

There was a long silence and Duo was grateful. The entire conversation felt like the sensation of falling while you’re lying in your bed: a total mind fuck. But he wasn’t really falling, right?

 

If he had fallen in love with Heero – as long ago as his mother claimed – why did he think for all those years that he was in love with his boyfriends? It was never an overwhelming epiphany, it was just a given. That sense of curiosity when getting to know someone new; that growing comfort as you spend more time together; the lust for sex; remembering to buy them flowers once in a while, and take them to a nice restaurant; making compromises to avoid arguments and being the best version of himself – that was his idea of love, because that was his idea of a relationship; the two went hand-in-hand. His friendship with Heero was devotion, trust, stability, admiration, respect, tears of laughter, shared ambitions, tacit understanding, the freedom to be wholly himself - even give expression to the worst parts of himself without fear of judgment – and that feeling of peace and home; the madness of their life melting away and leaving them as just two regular boys, cuddling up on the couch together, watching cartoons that they grew up watching. That was his idea of _friendship_ , because that was what he had known since he was seven years old! 

 

Of course, as puberty hit the two of them like a freight train, Duo noticed how attractive Heero was – and he never stopped noticing it – but without a second thought, he had filed him away in the “don’t even think about it” section, and never reconsidered that label. It was as simple as that. Heero was his brother and his bandmate; he was the most important person in his life – why risk that by complicating matters with dating and sex when they could both get that from someone else? Even though he was beautiful and sexy and _everything…_ And even though none of Heero’s boyfriends were ever good enough for him… and none of Duo’s boyfriends could ever compare to the Japanese man.

 

“Duo, I can hear the wheels turning in your head,” his mother interrupted with a bemused tone. “Talk to me. Tell me what’s going on up there.”

 

“Look, even if you are right,” he ignored the quirk of her eyebrow, “why would I want to change anything? What I have with Heero is the best thing in my life – why change something that is so great and risk wrecking it?”

 

Terry fired back: “But why would you deny the two of you the chance to make it even better? Duo, you are not the type to settle, you are not the type to avoid risks. You skipped on college and wasted your little savings on a plane ticket and three months’ worth of rent to move to LA – all by yourself – to chase your dreams. You even convinced Heero to follow you there, even though you knew it could all fall apart and it could fail – you knew _you_ could fail.” She grabbed both his hands and squeezed them tightly. “But you didn’t fail, because it was meant to be.” She paused before driving home the message: “You and Heero are meant to be, Duo.”

 

He started shaking his head, but not at her. He was swarmed with memories of the past twenty years. His life had revolved around Heero; he never regretted a single moment of it, always knowing Heero was the key to his own happiness. They had their own pre-show rituals and their own, short-hand language. They shared a house, a cat, a career and a life. Everything about them was interwoven and it had always given Duo a sense of security that allowed him to take the risks he was known for. He dared to push the boundaries, because he knew that even if he failed, he would never fall; Heero would hold him upright and support his weight for as long as he needed.

 

“Duo, who makes you most happy?”

 

“… Heero,” he admitted, claiming differently would be a lie so grotesque he wouldn’t be able to face himself in the mirror.

 

“Who do you want to come home to everyday?”

 

“Heero.” David – or “Da~vid” as his parents kept saying – asked him to come live with him and Duo had said no, because he couldn’t be without Heero. The relationship had fizzled and died over the span of the following three days. David couldn’t handle the rejection. 

 

“Who’s the most beautiful person you know, inside and out?”

 

He said that in an interview once, and the quote had haunted him ever since; the crazy shippers – who weren’t as crazy after all, it appeared – loved throwing it in his face. It was the truth though. “Heero.”

 

“Who means the most to you in the entire world? Who would you die for?”

 

“Heero…” He chuckled breathlessly, “But I’d die for you too, you know?”

 

She simply smiled at him.

 

“So Heero told you he’s in love with me?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Did you tell him that you think I’m in love with him too?”

 

“I did.”

 

“Oh…” He thought for a moment, but any attempt at serious contemplation was like trying to build a house of cards on a dingy out at sea. “Then why didn’t he ‘take the risk’?”

 

“Would you have preferred that?”

 

“I-…” Yes! No? Maybe? What? “I don’t know.”

 

“Heero may have changed a lot but deep inside he is still that shy boy. He always lets you take the lead because he trusts that you will do what is right for both of you.”

 

That made him smile, even at the inappropriate time. Annoyance returned to him as realized: “So all these years you two have been talking about me behind my back?”

 

“I took the liberty only because I knew you would thank me one day,” his mother replied smartly.

 

They were interrupted by Harper shuffling into the kitchen. “Are you two done? Scott said you were having a discussion, but my show comes on in ten minutes, so I can’t keep him occupied much longer.”

 

“Don’t worry about it, darling. We’re done.”

 

Duo blinked at her. “We are?”

 

“Yes,” she quipped. “You know we are. There is nothing else left to say. There is nothing else I need to say.” A little smirk graced her lips.

 

“Oh, you told him about the Heero-thing, did you?” Then Harper looked away from his wife and gave Duo a silly grin and a pat on his shoulder.

 

“Oh my God, you too?”

 

“I have bad news for you, Duo. Everybody knows you’re in love with Heero. Your mother and I. Your old teachers. Your bandmates. Your fans.” He looked over his shoulder to confirm it was still the three of them in the kitchen before he added: “Even Scott.”

 

Duo’s stomach dropped. “What?” He hissed.

 

“He came back into the study and told me you two were having a heated discussion. I tried to cover for you, but he told me I didn’t need to lie, that he knew you were talking about Heero.”

 

His heart clenched. He never wanted to hurt Scott, the kind man didn’t deserve to be treated like that! “He overheard us?”

 

“No, he said he had always known he was either living on borrowed time with you or would be playing second fiddle to Heero.”

 

“Oh God.” He hid his face in his hands in shame.

 

Terry rubbed his arm soothingly. “I’m sorry dear. I know you never meant to hurt anybody.”

 

“Where is he?”

 

“He’s waiting in the study.”

 

“Is he upset?”

 

“I don’t think so.”

 

With a heavy heart Duo left the kitchen, saying goodbye to his parents, and then went to fetch Scott so they could head to their hotel.

 

During the fifteen-minute drive Scott enthusiastically recounted the time he spent alone with Harper, alluding to nothing. Duo said nothing, but made an effort to listen and nod along.

 

They had already checked into the hotel earlier, so their room was ready and waiting for them.

 

“It’s still early, want to go out?” Scott asked, pretending not to notice how distant his boyfriend was.

 

“Out? In this town?” He chuckled bitterly. “Do you _like_ cowboy themed dive bars?”

 

Scott let out a laugh. “I guess we’ll just raid the minibar then. Getting drunk is much more fun when you’re wearing cozy hotel robes anyway. I’m gonna take a shower, care to join me?”

 

Duo didn’t understand why Scott was acting that way – so normal. He shook his head and pulled his long rope of hair over his shoulder, talking vaguely about it being a nightmare to wash and dry.

 

“Okay. Don’t get started on the minibar without me!” He disappeared into the bathroom with the toiletries from his suitcase and the big, white robe.

 

Duo dropped down onto his bed, spread eagle. He stared up at the ornate, plaster decoration on the ceiling, skimming the walls and circling the base of the chandelier overhead. As a member of a financially successful band, he’d been able to afford fancy hotel rooms for the past few years. The rooms were beautiful, the bathrooms were luxurious, the minibars were well-stocked and the robes were ultra-soft. Once they could afford it, their manager forced Duo and Heero to stop sharing rooms – too afraid that they could get sick of each other near the end of an eight month long tour when everyone was exhausted and irritable – but Duo still remembered the early days most fondly, when they shared rooms in motels that smelled like stale pizza and the cologne of the previous guest. They’d wake up in the morning playing a game of their own invention: “Where the Fuck are we?”, consisting of them trying to remember which city in which country they were in, while hungover from the celebratory beers after last night’s gig and disoriented from their constant travelling – bonus points if they could guess the name of the motel.

 

Scott’s voice drifted through the walls as he sang a tune, maybe trying to entice Duo to join him after all. Scott didn’t realize that Duo found the sound of his singing voice grating and it especially annoyed him when he sang one of the band’s songs, going screechy trying to mimic Heero’s riffs. It were little things like that.

 

It was always little things like that.

 

Duo didn’t like how Shawn would often say “That’s funny”, rather than actually laughing – but he did always laugh at his _own_ jokes and it was obnoxious. He didn’t like how impatient and irritated Evan got with fans, taking every tweet and glittery sign held up in the crowd too seriously. He especially didn’t like how slowly Da~vid talked, stretching every other vowel, and pausing mid-sentence like a politician giving a rehearsed speech and pausing for effect whenever it said so on the teleprompter.

 

Duo hated those little things. He never told any of them, because who was he to try and change someone? Or maybe… maybe he didn’t tell them because he didn’t want to give them the opportunity to change. Maybe he liked getting annoyed by those little things, because it made it okay when his boyfriends would break up with him. It was okay because they were annoying anyway.

 

Heero was also far from perfect – he had little things too, little quirks. Like Heero’s three OCD taps on his microphone before every show to test if it was working, or snapping his fingers to a song playing on the radio. He also left glasses of water all throughout the house – like the damn kid from “Signs” – because he was always drinking to keep his vocal chords hydrated, and their cat would knock them over and then freak out. And after a show he would fall asleep neglecting to take off his dark make-up – when he woke up, he looked like a raccoon, with his eyelashes clumped together. But Duo loved all those little things, although he didn’t understand the distinction.

 

The only thing he disliked about Heero was the man’s dating life. He always went for those artsy types who were way too cool to like the band’s music, but they didn’t mind guzzling down drinks at exclusive clubs on the band’s tab, or eat at fancy restaurants where you had to make reservations three months in advance, unless – of course – you were dating “Heero _Fucking_ Yuy”. Duo never understood, but now he did. Heero had always been in love with him, so he wasn’t looking for a great guy, just a handsome lay – like he always said. Heero hadn’t cared about any of those douchebags and that actually relieved Duo to realize, or else he’d still have serious questions about his friend’s judge of character.

 

His own boyfriends were different, in the sense that they were at least nice. In hindsight, they were nothing special, but they were good, genuine guys. Heero liked them too. If the Japanese singer was ever jealous of any of them, he never let it show; he was friendly with all of them and never said a single bad word about them, not even about those awfully annoying little things. He even stayed friends with two or three of them after their relationship with Duo had ended. Heero would probably keep in touch with Scott too – they had gotten quite close, and how could they not? Anyone who dated Duo dated Heero as well, to some extent.

 

Duo frowned at the seemingly innocent thought that had been a recurring joke between the two friends. Had all his relationships just been a three-way with Heero, with sex being the only thing the tenor was ever left out on?

 

Scott walked back into the room, freshly showered and looking relaxed in the oversized robe. He held a towel to his head, absentmindedly rubbing his hair dry. The man opened the minibar and selected two miniature bottles of alcohol, noting excitably: “Ooh, Kahlua.”

 

Duo sat up on the bed, crossing his legs underneath him. He accepted the bottle that was handed to him, but didn’t open it like Scott did. He wrung the bottle in his hands. His palms were getting sweaty. The thought of spending the night with Scott made him feel uncomfortable. The sex was great, but the man was poor at cuddling; it was like their bodies didn’t fit well together. Duo never understood why that was because Scott was just as short as Heero. All his boyfriends had been just as short as Heero, and the two of them molded together perfectly…

 

Scott planted himself on the edge of the bed, with one leg drawn up to his chest. The robe fell down, exposing his thigh and Duo looked. Catching his stare, Scott smirked at him and Duo forced his gaze up to meet Scott’s eyes.

 

His blue eyes. Blue like Shawn’s. Blue like Evan’s. Blue like David’s. Yet never quite blue like Heero’s. Never as special. Never as inviting.

 

Of everything that had happened that day, _that_ was the moment that something clicked. Duo had spent his entire adult life looking for another Heero: casting cute, short boys with blue eyes in the role. He had been playing pretend with them, using them only to supplement his relationship with Heero, using them as a lightning rod for his subconscious attraction to his best friend, just so he wouldn’t cross that line with his best friend.

 

His face twisted in horror.

 

“Babe?” Scott’s smirk fell. He put aside his drink and scooted closer. “What’s wrong?”

 

“I’m so sorry,” he blurted, his eyes begging Scott for understanding and forgiveness, even though he was well aware he deserved neither.

 

“Babe?” He looked confused.

 

Right, Scott couldn’t read his mind like Heero, he had no idea what was going on. “We-…” He cleared his throat. “We need to talk.”

 

Scott blinked. “Oh.” He moved to put some more distance between them again. He lowered his head and nodded slowly. “This is it, huh?”

 

Duo’s heart broke. Scott was such a nice guy, he _should_ have fallen in love with him. But Duo’s heart was never his to give; Heero had been keeping it safe for him all those years. “I’m sorry… I’m so sorry.”

 

Scott wiped his hand by his face but when he looked up there was no trace of tears, or any hint in his eyes or the tone of his voice that he was upset. “It’s okay, Duo. I knew this was coming.”

 

“It’s not fair. It’s not fair to you.”

 

He shrugged. “It’s not like I went in unsuspecting. I was your friend first, remember?” He offered him a smile and Duo felt horrible. Scott was the one getting dumped, yet he was still trying to make Duo feel better. “I was around during David… I saw what happened. I’m not stupid.”

 

“No, I’m the stupid one,” Duo agreed with self-loathing. “Why didn’t you ever say anything? Even before we started dating?”

 

“It wasn’t my place. I could tell you both loved each other, but I figured you had your reasons for not going for it.”

 

“You knew about Heero’s feelings too?”

 

He nodded.

 

“Oh God.” The guitarist curled in on himself. “I’m so sorry.” All the time the three of them had spent together - on the couch, at restaurants, in movie theaters, backstage, in the club, falling asleep together in the same bed, drunk out of their minds – Scott had known. The guilt was unbearable.

 

“You can stop saying that,” Scott assured him. “I’ve been selfish too. I liked dating you, even though I knew I was standing between you and the person _everyone_ knows you ought to be with. Oftentimes, I did think to myself: ‘if I just leave them alone right now, they won’t even notice and maybe then they’ll finally…’ But I didn’t want to leave. It was fun to be around you two.” He chuckled sheepishly and scratched the back of his neck. “We had a good time, right?”

 

Duo looked up at him and nodded. “Yes. We did. You’re such a great guy…”

 

“I know.” He smirked again, but there was a small touch of sadness to the way his lips didn’t curl up all the way. “But I’m not Heero. I get it. He’s your _Robin_.”

 

Duo smiled at the inside-joke. “You’ll find your Batman,” he promised him. “A better one than me.”

 

“Hm.” He put his finger to his chin in thought. “I guess I could settle for Christian Bale.”

 

They shared a laugh and talked for a moment longer. Then they both got up from the bed to hug and kiss each other goodbye, and Duo zipped up his suitcase and left the room, after making Scott promise to keep in touch and telling him that he wanted them to be friends again whenever he was ready. When he closed the hotel door behind him, he felt like he was leaving more than just Scott in the past. Standing in the hallway, on the other side of the door of it all, his head cleared and quieted. The questions were replaced with answers.

 

He pulled his suitcase along with him to the elevator and fished his cellphone out of his pocket and dialed the number under speed dial 2.

 

The phone rang five times before his mother answered: “Honey?” She sounded tired but also concerned.

 

Duo pulled the phone away from his ear to check the time and inwardly cursed himself. It was well past midnight and his parents had long called it a night. Still, though, he had to say _it_. It just burst out of him: “I’m in love with Heero, mom.” After saying the words he felt light as a feather and only his grip on the handle of the heavy suitcase was keeping him grounded.

 

He imagined her smiling as she replied: “… I know, Honey. But shouldn’t you be calling him instead?”

 

“I’m not going to call him,” he said with determination. “I need to _see_ him.”

 

“That’s a good idea,” she agreed. The tone of her voice wavered with emotion as she remarked: “Oh, Honey, you are going to make him so happy.” Then she covered the receiver and exchanged a few words with her husband, presumably telling him the news.

 

“Or-… Or do you think I should wait until tomorrow morning? It’s late.”

 

“Duo,” Terry spoke firmly, “don’t you dare let that boy spend one more night without you at his side.”

 

He released a breathy chuckle. “Yeah. Yeah, okay… Mom?”

 

“Yes, honey?”

 

“Thank you.”

 

She laughed and said something indiscernible to her husband again, before replying: “Just doing my job, honey. Now go get our boy.”

 

He smiled. “Goodnight, mom. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

 

“Bring our son-in-law,” she reminded him and then disconnected the line.

 

He shook his head and stepped into the elevator that had been waiting for him to get on. His sweaty hand nearly lost its grip on the handle of his suitcase as he tried to maneuver the heavy thing around. He was nervous, his stomach was full of butterflies. It reminded him of the nerves he felt whenever he was about to go on stage, it was a feeling he didn’t shy away from, he was addicted to it.

 

The doors closed, and while the elevator descended down to the lobby, Duo navigated the screen of his phone with his thumb to open the messages app. He took a moment to read the last text that had been sent to him, early that morning. Yesterday morning, technically, about two hours before their flight.

 

**_Heero <3: I asked Kate to stop by the pharmacy for you to get you some Benadryl. You know how you get during flights ;) Pick me up at the studio in 30. Love you X_ **

 

It had been _right_ in front of him all that time.

 

His thumb worked quickly to type a message.

 

**Hey Troutman, u up?**

 

He waited with baited breath.

 

**_Heero <3: Dustin…_ **

**_Heero <3: I am now :P_ **

 

**Is it okay if I cone over?**

***come**

 

**_Heero <3: My parents are asleep_ **

**_Heero <3: Wanna sneak into my bedroom like you did when we were kids? :)_ **

 

As Duo typed his response he was interrupted by another message.

 

**_Heero <3: Are you sure you can still climb in through the window, old man? XD_ **

 

He laughed as he walked across the lobby, earning an odd look from the young woman manning the check-in desk.

 

**Crack that window, Troutman. I’m coming over >:]**

 

Then he added more seriously:

 

**I need to see you. It’s important.**

 

**_Heero <3: Okay. I’m here for you. I’ll see in a few. Love you X_ **

 

He didn’t reply – he planned on “I love you too” being the first words out of his mouth as soon as he climbed in through Heero’s bedroom window. He had reached the parking lot and stuffed his suitcase in the trunk of his Dad’s truck that he had on loan.

 

It still felt like he was taking a huge risk. They may be in love, but there were no guarantees that they would work well as boyfriends as they did as best friends. Not much would change, but some things would and there was no predicting the consequences of that. They would also have to consider if, how and when they would tell their bandmates and their fans – although odds were they wouldn’t be able to keep it a secret for long. Their bandmates had always been accepting of their sexuality, but they’d have to get at least a little anxious at the possibility of a lover’s quarrel interfering with their music and their ability to perform. And while the fanbase had already been shipping the lead vocalist with the guitarist like it was their profession, there could still be backlash from the crazy fans that thought they might have actually stood a chance at “turning Heero straight” for them, not to mention the scrutiny their relationship would be under could add pressure – if the relationship would fail, the fans would never let him forget.

 

It was a risk, but Duo was going to take it.

 

Besides, if his mother was right, he had nothing to worry about; they were meant to be together.

 

And mother was always right.

 

**THE END**

 

**(no gingerbread men were harmed in the making of this story)**

 


End file.
